What is a WIFE?

1. another man's stupidity;

2. someone who is too pretty for words - but not for arguments;

3. a great reassurance during her husband's troubles - those, that as a bachelor, he would never have had;

4. a lady with a whim of iron;

5. a person who sits up with you when you are sick, and puts up with you when you are not;

6. the one person with whom there is no point arguing, if you win - you lose;

7. a woman who uses the technique of angling - each think the best one got away;

8. a woman who can be branded intelligent when she sees through her husband - she's understanding when she sees him through;

9. what a man blames things on when he can't figure a way to blame the govt;

10. a woman who can spot a another woman's hair on her husband's coat from twelve feet away but can never see a fire plug when she parks;

11. a woman who would rather mend your ways than your socks;

12. a woman who, in the same breath, can complain she has nothing to wear, and is bemoaning she needs more closet space;

13. a spouse who always feels she doesn't dance enough;

14. a woman who has ambiguity in her roles when her husband finds her a wh*re in the kitchen and a cook in the bedroom;

15. a person who only lasts as long as a marriage - an ex-wife is forever!